Fearful follicles
A few months ago I read a 'fun' statistic in a newspaper (you know, the kind of thing that seems far less true than the whole of the horoscope page) that suggested that people who shave every day live longer than those who don't.
Now, I know that producing statistics is a serious art, however you can easily twist them to produce any result you desire (e.g. by interviewing one person). I also am fairly convinced that there is absolutely no link between having a beard and heading to an early grave (unless you're one of the Twits and the excessive amount of cornflake build-up sends you unexpectedly toppling over).
Even so, as stupid as it seems, I now feel like I'm going to die if I forget to shave on a given day (easily done if you work from home and no one is going to notice).
Anyway, women don't shave every day and they live longer. What's all that about?
posted by Purple Smoke @ 1:04 PM
3 comments
3 Comments:
yes though we shave on a less regular basis, we have to shave a larger surface area!
Ah - that's interesting. So longevity is related to the number of hairs one shaves off. A number of theories spring to mind:
1. There is something toxic in hair, therefore it should be removed.
2. A large amount of hair produces a significant mass which slows us down, causing sluggish behaviour and, ultimately, an untimely death.
3. The removed hair, which ends up down the plughole, is secretly being filtered once it reaches the sewage system by the government. The hair, once clean, is used for products such as wigs, bedding for pets, cushion padding, etc. and forms a significant export from this country. The money is used to lower our taxes, giving a better quality of life, and therefore increases our life expectancy.
Alternatively 4. People who don't shave are lazy no-goodniks who are destined to end up dead in a pile of their own dreadlocks and wooly jumpers while ther rest of us productive members of society laugh.
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